The website GovernmentAttic.org files Freedom of Information Acts and posts the pdf files to the internet.  While this may sound like a yawn-fest to some of you, to me it’s nerd heaven.  But today, a gem.  FCC complaints against Saturday Night Live from 2008-2012 were posted.  Hundreds of pages of complaints from people across the country.  Let me tell you – it’s some funny reading. You can download the entire pdf here:
FCC_ComplaintsSNL_2008-2012

All of these are REAL – all public information.

So, I wanted to pretend I worked for SNL answering guest mail.  Check it out:

1)

Dear Gulfport, Mississippi:

Thank you for the description of the skit.  It’s important to me that you fully understand the concept, which I think we can agree, is a real-world problem in today’s world of broken families.  Susan Sarandon actually did win a coveted acting role to make it into our SNL Digital Shorts; we don’t just cast anyone.  SNL is proud to be the gutter-bilge of NBC.  Thanks for watching.

2)

Dear Prescott, AZ:

The fact that you care enough to send an email with your complaint really shows how much you care about the community.  Some things you should note….1) The performer in question that dropped the F-Bomb was Jenny Slate.  Not Jeremy Slate.  In fact, actor Jeremy Slate died in 2006 and was best known for his roles in Girls! Girls! Girls!, Lawnmower Man, and Hell’s Angels ’69.   2) Jenny is a SHE, not a HE.  3) I’m not sure children and grandchilden should be up at 11pm to watch our PG-13 program.  But I don’t want to question your parenting choices.  4) We do not control the MSN homepage – so first find out what you want to complain about and then please direct it to the proper people.

3)

Dear Chandler, AZ:

We are so happy someone paid attention to the McGruber skit.  We are very unsure of that character and happy to know that he has some brand identification in the market.  Second, please understand, we are not a public television network.  Comcast now owns 51% of NBC Universal while GE owns 49%.  We do not do pledge breaks asking for public support.  Your money does not pay our bills.  I think you’re thinking of PBS.  Thanks for your support!

4)

Dear Pinehurt, NC:

Obviously you haven’t gotten the memo in North Carolina, but Tina Fey is a big, F*ing deal and has single handedly saved NBC.  Also, if you think Tina Fey would legit do a striptease if not for comedy, you obviously don’t understand comedy. Keep watching!

5)

Dear Pueblo, CO:

Thankfully, there is this thing called Urban Dictionary to help me find out what you meant by buttox.

I think we can all agree that neither is a good thing.

6)

Dear Basking Ridge, NJ

Tina Fey is a national treasure.  In fact, I can see all of her comedy awards from my house.  Please go back to Fox News where you belong.

7)

Dear Shapleigh, Maine:

“Sports are to show respect to fans as well as ethical sportsmanship.”  I assume you meant to direct this email to ESPN, or perhaps the NBC sports department.  I mean, with all the felons playing in the NBA and NFL, the doping, steroid rumors and all, you can’t be simply complaining about a skit we did during a comedy show.  I’ll go ahead and forward your complaint.  Meanwhile, I can recommend some good books to read about Lance Armstrong.

8)

Dear San Antonio, Texas:

Your note really got me thinking, and reminded me of my favorite song from the show, Yo Gabba Gabba.