I’m afraid of bridges. Especially drawbridges – if you are on a road, and it’s designed to actually open at some point, it’s not really a road and I’m not interested in being on it.

But really bridges in general freak me out. I mean, freak.me.out.

I like to think it all started when I was about seven. As I recall the story, we were in downtown Chicago. I was with a friend and our moms. We were at Grand Central train station and were walking over to the Sears Tower to head to the stop.

Being kids, we ran a bit ahead of our parents and were on one of the drawbridges when an alarm started going off and the bridge started opening. WE WERE STANDING ON IT!! Almost near the middle. It opened maybe an inch before closing again. There was no opportunity to cars or people to fall off the bridge. I remember crying – and that’s about it.

To this day, bridges just make me mental.

Like anxiety attack, panic attack, I like to swear crazy.

When in Chicago, this is a problem as it’s almost impossible to walk anywhere in the Loop without having to walk across a bridge. And the problem is it’s not like they are even nice bridges. They are falling apart, missing concrete and frankly, look like death traps.

Here in Florida, it’s a problem when I drive out to the coast. I have a routine that if I’m a passenger, I just don’t want anyone to talk to me and I have a little freakout in my head.

Now if I’m the driver, I have to be in the innermost lane, I don’t want to be dangling on the edge. I need to go slow, regardless of the speed limit. It can’t be raining, windy or really anything less then sunny. And I swear…a lot.

Yesterday, I had to drive across the Sunshine Skyway bridge. I’ve lived in Florida almost 13 years and have vowed I would never drive over it. But sometimes, you have to suck it up after an already 4 hour car ride in the rain and just get to where you are going. My theory was, if it’s raining when I hit the bridge, I turn around and take a detour. If it’s not raining, I have to grow up and just drive.

And drive I did. Since I was pretty convinced I was going to die…I decided to set my camera to record and just drive and see what happened.

What you’re about to see, I’m not proud of. Please don’t judge me…and don’t watch with your kids in the room. I feel the need to share it with you so you understand how much I really hate these things. Also, want to share so that next time you are on a bridge, and the car in front of you is going 20 miles per hour and looks like they are talking to themselves…please have a bit of compassion for what they are going through.